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Fading Friendships

Updated: May 24

Friends come and go. Don’t be discouraged.


Growing up I’ve always heard quality over quantity when it comes to friendships. It’s not about how many friends you have, but rather the experiences and opportunities your friends can offer you. After high school, I really started thinking about this saying; it was easy to make friends when we were all under the same roof.


Once I graduated, I found that some friendships faded. No matter how hard you try to keep them together, people are constantly growing. Whether you like it or not.


Rather than letting a fading friendship discourage you from making new friends, take this moment to reflect on how you handle situations like this. Will you close yourself off from the world or will enter society with a new way of thinking?


Is it okay to let friendships fade?


Of course. As mentioned, people grow. When they grow, they may take on new interests that don’t necessarily align with yours. That’s okay.


Throughout high school and college, I had a “ride-or-die” friend by my side. Always. It was nice to have someone to go to with exciting news or even just having someone to go to for advice. Unfortunately, after our college graduation our friendship became strained. We were struggling to see each other because we were so busy, the pandemic was in full on terror mode, the odds just weren’t on our side.


At the time, we were learning how to become fully functioning adults. My friend enjoyed things that I didn’t and vice versa. That doesn’t make them a bad friend, it just means we had to work on making sure the other person enjoys the time that we spend together. Ultimately, doing whatever it took to make the friendship last… which didn’t work out. I think once graduation arrived, I was faced with the reality that was us seeing each other less frequently. Literally only seeing each other for weeks on social media.


Does social media put a strain on friendships?


I think so. Once my friendship was over, I didn’t unfollow my friend. Although, I should have. Of course, jealousy sets in when they are out with other people and you are struggling to make time for any social activity with anyone.


It’s like a breakup.


In the moment, you think there’s still hope to make the friendship work. Realistically, it’s over.


What do when you’re going through a friendship breakup

  • Give yourself a chance to heal. Losing a friend of 1 month is just as hard as losing a lifelong friend. It’s okay to take as much time as you need in order to move on.

  • Stay neutral. The last thing you should be doing is talking bad about an ex-friend.

  • Talk to a loved one. Whether you’re talking to a family member or another friend, it’s always a great idea to let go of your thoughts, rather than holding them in.

  • Detox from social media. Going back to social media, it might be a good idea to unfollow the person. If you’re really going through it, delete the whole platform.

  • Reflect. Think about what could have been done better, not just from you. This allows you to look at what you want from a friend and what you don’t.


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